Pimmi Hello there! Pimmi and Pati here again! All of Mordor was in a state this week...

Pati Folk leaking everywhere!

Pimmi Quite! Just like leaks of rainwater, people were wandering everywhere- even where they were not supposed to go.

Pati Living dangerously as they'd say.

Pimmi It was the local Mordor Open House.

Pati Which to some folk seemed to mean poke and prod a house!

Pimmi Notices provided by the folks in the International Relations group were posted all around the closer cities and towns and mountaintops. Brought them out of the woodwork!

Pati The nerve many had!

Pimmi They brought axes some of them.. thought Mordor was here for the dismanteling to be hauled off! Imagine! No hello, no howdy-do just chop chop!.

Pati Slop slop with their muddy boots!

Pimmi So we had to correct them by chasing some people around who were taking statues and art.. we found some little ladies asleep in our beds! When I woke them up they tried to take our sheets!

Pati I found one rummaging in my things with my combs In Her Mouth! Free her hands up for more pickin'!

Pimmi So once the correct idea was instilled, many settled in for what they were brought there for- to have a nice time and see what was being done. There were posters everywhere close, so we had folk from many places.. even farther away who had heard about it. A lovely lass we know came all the way from Mirkwood where she runs the Mirkwood Diner.

Pati Hmmph!

Pimmi The committee did not pick Pati's poster design.

Pati Theirs was a bore, I refuse to post it in our establishments, so I posted mine anyway!

Pimmi Yes we did put Pati's up in the Cafeteria and Main Gate Snack Shack and the Angmar Deli.

Pati Theirs was a yawnfest of scrolly golden things and fancy language! Mine was FUN and likeable. I thought we were supposed to be FUN and likeable now.

Pimmi We are dear, but you must learn to cope with disappointment. Not everyone can appreciate.. umm.. "fine art".

Pati It WAS fine art- I think the members were threatened by my talents. An obvious genius in bloom!

Pimmi Yes dear I am certain thats exactly what it was, so may we move on now? We do have more nice things to share.

Pati Hmm yes but its their loss of course, try to bring in a touch of culture.. touch of class..

Pimmi Yes yes.. are you done now? Should I move aside and let you share the downfall of the creative world due to the lack of inclusion of your poster?

Pati You are full of big words today! Yes yes lets move on... I will frame my picture and display it so at least when folk come here they will be treated to .. ART!

Pimmi Thats fine, and now that thats settled.. why don't you tell people what happened over the last week.

Pati My momentary sadness prevents me..

Pimmi Here we go again...

Pati So You share the news.. since you seem impervious to my pain...

Pimmi Look who has the big words now!

Pati *sigh*

Pimmi The Main Gate Snack Shack was re-done!

Pati oooOOOH Thats right!

Pimmi That perked you up.

Pati Lovely work was done.

Pimmi It went from a shabby but pleasant place to a sleek and shiny welcoming place. The Main Gate guards use it as a break room too and love it! They tell stories and share experiences- some of them were stationed there from the evil days and they love to scare and thrill the tourists! Don't worry, they are all Good now like us.

Pati They were having some fun with the Open House festivities!

Pimmi Some easily scared people were there shaking and listening until they were told thats all past and won't happen again... but they were ready to run I think!

Pati We brought over some treats to add to the menu and some hid behind us until they saw we were orcish folks and ran again back and forth like that and hid under the tables until everyone started laughing.

Pimmi It was fun when they calmed down.

Pati Some folk need to be a little more scared though!

Pimmi Some found people wandering into areas blocked off, climbing on and into ruins that were shaky even some being brought back who were found wandering near the rim of Mount Doom! Had never seen Lava before they say!

Pati Must have thought it was orange pudding!

Pimmi NOW THATS A HEARTBURN YOU DON'T WANT!

Pati You made a funny!

Pimmi I can be funny when I want.

Pati But we had to be solemn a few days ago...

Pimmi Oh yes we had a big visit the other day. A King! The King of what we never knew but he rode through here on enormous horses with many other people.

Pati Some ladies, some dwarves, maybe some dwarf ladies.. its hard to tell.. all very regal. Very clean too.

Pimmi We watched and smiled and waved when the King waved but they were all so sad. Its hard to remember all the bad things sometimes... but then folk who weren't under any spell remember all of it. I feel bad for them..all those memories they carry!

Pati ..and we don't know what to do..

Pimmi But we are dedicated to making things nice now!

Pati And FUN!

Pimmi Fun is one of the official designations we need to strive for. We just be ourselves, folk say we are fun.. so we do our bit for the good of the land!

Pati People say the gobbies are fun too. What a surprise there!

Pimmi Oh my it wasn't fun cleaning up but it was fun teaching many to cook.

Pati Some just want to play and balance cups on their heads and lick dishes...

Pimmi But some have shown a real interest in the food arts.

Pati Those little fingers catch quite a lot of tasty things too.

Pimmi Out in the brambles and spinneys they find nice snack treats. We had fun making up new recipes.

Pati I was ever so stuffed!

Pimmi Well you didn't have to sample entire meals, a spoonful might have done just as well!

Pati Not quite! You have to have the FULL experience, see how it all settles in.. how it fills the corners!

Pimmi Its settling on your bum is where it is, filling out some new corners on you!

Pati I look lovely!

Pimmi Of course you do, there is just a bit more of you I think.

Pati Built for comfort not speed!

Pimmi Now WHERE did you hear that!

Pati I'll never tell!

Pimmi Well we can tell you how wonderful the gobbie cooking experience came out. We made a whole magic box page about it...

Here! Gobbie cooking adventures!

Pati With all the visitors we had some help!

Pimmi It was worth all of it because now we can leave some gobbies in charge of cooking while we check on other locations in development. This will help greatly when the other castles are built up. We'll have room service to the Nazgul Castles!

Pati Gobbies running back and forth with trays of yummies! People will never leave then!

Pimmi Thats the plan! Get folk to come and fall in love with Mordor and stay and make a life! Raise babies, plant gardens, play music, do their work... Mordor will be beautiful!

Pati Scary past, pretty future! All dressed up in flowers!

Pimmi Now you know what I'm going to say! We are dressed up better too. Aprons! Our darling friend brought us aprons so now our new pretty clothes don't get mucked up. Not certain why we didn't think of this before.. Traders bring pretty things in to wear so now they won't get filthy.

Pati We were mucked up in evil times, I think when you are evil you don't mind being dirty. The Troubles were dirty times.

Pimmi Back then we were naked. Shameless tarts we were- well.. Pati most of all! But now we wear clothes and the human men thanked us profusely.. something about hiding sags and bags but we never carried bags of any sort on us!

Pati They meant our bags... on us... the ol' Pimmi and Pati meats.

Pimmi I'd go about covering bags of vittles.

Pati I had to explain what the men meant, imagine me explaining to miss smarty no-pants.

Pimmi No eye for a lovely shape those skinny human men. We have had quite a few pinches from dwarves though, now thats a race with wonderful taste! We ARE single gals so I don't mind a smile or two from under those beards!

Pati Pimmi! My my! Once we worked out what winking was we stopped telling them to get their eyes checked. Thought it was the dust! I am not certain but I think I might have a sweetheart or two now.

Pimmi Only two? You aren't telling all now are you!

Pati I have a gaggle of admirers!

Pimmi Such a tart! Well we do have some lovely clothes, saved luckily from foraging ladies in our closets! But we wear aprons everywhere now on the food job. We all share little tips like this with surrounding area folks. They come here and we learn from them they learn from us. Everyone is curious about orcs now and ask us so many questions. Some very bad mis-information is out there about orcs. But we can hardly remember anything about actually being an orc. Just dark times we are glad are over.

Pati Some people are still very rude. We ARE part elf! But we understand. We might have eaten a relative or two of theirs in the past but the past is gone.. if I can learn coping so can they!

Pimmi Many more people are coming in with wares to exchange and sell. I don't know quite what to do every time when they want to sell because we have no money set up yet. We do have plans for that in the future. So we exchange metals and supplies. We collect the shiiny things humans like and exchange those too now. We are learing to use the things we have here and store many away for future folk who come and want to "sell". Very interesting concept that I think I'll like as I learn more.

Pati I just love the "fruit"! No bones no skin just all sweet juice and pulp and squish, lovely!

Pimmi It IS wonderful when food and fruits folk come in to show us things. I have set up regular delivery of items and I show them the things we have and what I can get for them and they tell me what they want in return and I'll have it for them when they come back! Amazing what one shiny stone will get you- entire wagon trains of foods! I do love it!

Pati She won't let me sample...

Pimmi For you a sample could mean a whole basket of purple fruits! We need to make nice things for the food services first.

Pati I sacrifice so!

Pimmi Yes yes you poor thing, you will just waste away won't you.. and whats that in your pocket?

Pati Just a sticky bun the gobbies made! Delish! Okay I'll push the magic box button now! *snugs!*

Some of the regal and clean visitors that came with the King. They seemed to like looking around even though they looked sad.
The Main Gate Snack Shack before.
And After!
One of the visitors to the Open House brought this jungle creature. Wonderfully furry and pleasant.. an "Ape"!
Pati's umm "Fine Art" poster...!
Of course our lovely home, the explosions in the roof are fixed, the Angmar Deli is as frisky as always- please don't go through our closets visitor ladies! Have a snack instead!
One of the many rooms set up with pictures of things to come. Come visit Mordor and see the progress yourself!
This human made us giggle. He won't stay in rooms, or the barracks, he stays in a small fabric pod on the ground! Even hobbits giggled. Oh well no matter if you want to stay in pods or palaces, come stay with us in Mordor! FUN for the whole family!
Remember to view our Gobbie cooking adventures! New recipes too!